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Black Friday!  Many are counting down the days. I hope people won’t have to die this year as a result of careless aggressive behavior, which demands psychiatric intervention with attitude modification.

Those of you rushing to the stores (lining up for bargains) need to ask yourselves one simple question… "Can I afford it?" Yes, you might be getting some of your purchases at a discount, but is that enough?

I know people and hear of even more who simply don’t have the finances, but put themselves out on a limb and all in the name of Christmas and the expectation of. So many would prefer to put themselves in debt or go deeper in debt instead of being responsible (sad, but true).

Hey, I’m not knocking the holidays.  There is nothing like waking up and seeing lots of gifts under the tree and discovering your name is attached to all of them. It’s a fantastic feeling. However, if you don’t have the money the moment is fleeting and can often lead to or an exacerbation of depression.

There is nothing wrong with scaling back, which with luck will allow you to tap into your creativity of what to buy and how to present it so that it appears gratifying. Just to be thought of should be enough, but I understand those who want (not need) just a bit more – especially if you’re a child, or one at heart.

One of my special Christmases (when frugality was a must) was small, but full of love and elegance. There was no tree, but many candles, cozy fires throughout the day and beautiful poinsettias. Dinner was a reserved everyday meal, but breakfast was beautifully presented with delicious food and champagne. The presents I acquired were modest, but the presentation meant so much to me and still does, thus one of my favorites. I received a stocking with one major gift and several small ones. There were handmade coupons for picnics in the park, nights out for happy hour and a few other things. The highlight was a card containing words that melted my heart and stay with me to this day.

So many raise their children with the presumption of getting and not giving. We go overboard, thus creating spoiled brats, who turn into precocious adults. When is it too much? Regardless of having the means, is it necessary and what does it teach?

I dare you to be discreet, but thoughtful with your gifts of the latest gadgets. Instead, maybe use your money to get a tutor for your child so that his/her grades will improve, thus fortifying their ability to better compete in a dog-eat-dog world. One of the greatest gifts you can give is words. So many of us purchase cards with beautiful sentiments by an anonymous author and then simply sign it. Why not add something more and not just, 'I love you'.  Speak from your heart and detail your love and devotion. If it’s a friend, share a memory or two.

Don’t over indulge your children with what’s hip and fresh. I guarantee they’ll respect you more when you create balance and pair gifts with creativity and words.

A word to the wise, be a responsible shopper. Don’t purchase what you can’t afford.  Think! – paerki

 (I can appreciate the following… "Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have… This year I only had to beat up 3 kids to get what I wanted on Black Friday… Oh for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money… Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.")